CSI: NY....Yummmmm

It had been quite a few months since my last extra gig. The money had run out and the interviews hadn't been going so well. So now I get to play a CSI tech and a cop. I was running a little bit late to set and though it had not been five minutes, I received a phone call from Central wondering where I was. I was afraid for what was to come. I made a friend on set who used to be a chemist and now he was an extra. That's quite the 180 if you ask me. We got a hold of some sides and acted out the scene together. It involved the CSI that Eddie Cahill plays interrogating some woman who stole her child from some unsuspecting parents way back or something like that. But before that scene played out, I got to go into the morgue for an intense quiet scene as two actors were looking at a burnt corpse deciding its gender. The director asked for one more take cause the actors had been on a role. I was crossing foreground in front of them..very quietly and headed over to put my folder on a metal table just as the actors finished their dialogue when BAM! I knocked into a metal cart which crashed into the glass wall. The Director yelled out CUT!... There goes the moment. All was fine though, and I actually made the director and the whole crew laugh. My face was turning bright red. Apparently I didn't kill the moment because we didn't have to do the take again, but also I opened myself up to ridicule and teasing from everyone on set.

Being teased and getting attention must be an attractive quality to have because as the scene ended, a fellow extra who used to be the naked dead body I was tagging decided to find out a little more about me. Note to all men reading this: When trying to guess a girl's age, never go up once you guess wrong. And boy..did he guess wrong...in fact he gave up before he even got to my age. "28? 29? 30? 27? 26? 25? 24? 23? Ok I give up..15?" In case you are all wondering, I was 22 at the time but apparently could pass for 30!! I felt so old at that moment and wanted to curl up in a ball and die. But not right away because I later found out the key to doing extra work...good food. There was grilled chicken and steak and crab legs and sushi, and the food was all brilliant. 5 star restaurant quality. How had I not known this before? People do extra work for the food. One of the PAs told me he gained 30 lbs while on set and then works it off when they are on hiatus. Too many cookies and cakes. I'd believe it. I couldn't remember the last time I had eaten so well. Who has chicken AND steak for lunch? Me....that's who.

After lunch I got to be a cop. The uniform was...well...interesting. When the costume lady asked my waist size, I replied with 28, which it is. So she gave me size 28 pants. Ten minutes later I come back down asking for a different size. I couldn't even get the pants on up to my knees. She gives me a 30 and a 32. Nope and Nope. I finally go back and grab the 34s. Snug, but I was too embarrassed to go back down for a bigger size. My escapade was witnessed by a stand-in doing yoga in the dressing room. "You better get a bigger size. You'll want to be comfortable." I didn't listen, but I don't think it mattered. Gun belts were not meant to be worn by women. I have never been so uncomfortable in my life. My back was killing me. I couldn't stand, I couldn't sit, I was pretty much resenting every single women's movement which called for equal jobs for both men and women. But seriously, if there was a burglar in your house...would you want a male cop or a female cop to show up and kill the bastard?......that's what I thought. What made matters worse is that the guest actress reading the part of the childnapper was dreadful. The whole crew was cringing and about to lose it. We were doing take after take of this woman's deadpan delivery. Move over Buster Keaton! Though obviously she could never pass it off as comedy...none of us were laughing at her, grinding our teeth, yes, laughing, no. My chemist friend came up to me later and told me that I was so much better in our little cold read. I was flattered, but wondered who couldn't have done better? Oh, there seemed hope for me yet. If she was getting work, I could too. And after a meal like the one I had on set, I was anxiously waiting for my next stint as an extra.